Apr 1 2009

What would it be like to be Free?

I think this is the first question we ask ourselves when realize we are trapped. But we are often not bound by physical constraints but mental ones. Often these binds are self imposed. What?

I will use the example in my life that began my real spiritual journey some years ago.

At the time I was a conflicted born again Christian. I was conflicted because my mind was at war with dogma, my heart battled belief.  Despite exploring deeply the depths of the Old and New Testament, I could not reconcile an omnipresent, all powerful loving God with the same figure depicted in church sermons as one who would condemn all unbelievers to an eternity of hell. It was not really the heaven and hell issue I had trouble with at the time (although, these concepts too have passed away), but the concept that God would condemn truly devout persons of other faiths to this fate.

Specifically, I did not believe God would condemn my mother to hell. My mom was a practicing Moslem and a member of a spiritual organization called Subud. And she was, until her passing, the most spiritual person I have ever met. My dilemma was that the Evangelical Christianity I had embraced teaches the idea that an individual must choose to accept Jesus as their personal Lord and Saviour to get a taste of Grace. God’s Grace was the thing that let you past the pearly gates. I will not get into the specifics of my internal dialog now, but it was a difficult time. As I think all spiritual crisis’s are. Ultimately, I realized I could not believe in a God that did not want someone like my Mom in heaven.

I left the church, with a heavy heart. But left it I did. And that was the catalyst for finding my own spiritual path. Catalysts are helpful because they offer us real options. These options are simply not available to us, because we have shut them out or ignored them. And as I stood looking forward to an far more uncertain future, without the comfort of a religion to boltster me, I felt free.

This website is part of my current journey to discover what works and what doesn’t.  This website is a work in progress. I am not a guru or spiritual leader. If you learn from me it probably be as much from my mistakes and success.We all have our own path, but we do have to take the steps ourselves to get to the end.

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